ODE TO A RUFFLED PETTICOAT

It seemed like such a wonderful idea

To fill out my skirts so prettily.

I bought the muslin and the ribbons

In what I thought was the right quantity.

The fabric was ripped along the grain

into long strips which were stitched in gathers;

216 inches take forever to sew.

Then I sat with a sore neck and pulled threads for hours.

Whilst dreaming of my beautiful garment

I pinned, and pressed, and stitched.

Hoping it would fit over my hoop,

My fingers busy despite the pins' sharp pricks.

Alas this skirt may prove to be my Moby Dick

As it is large, unwieldy, heavy, and white.

I've invested such muscle, time, and expense

Should I ever wear it I'll have to pretend delight.